A few weeks after returning home from 11 years in prison I was standing outside Kings Cross train station eating a sandwich when I was approached by a homeless man.
“Excuse me, mate, can you spare me something?”
He was of average height with an unshaven face and brown hair. He was wearing dirty white sports shoes and jeans. There were black greasy marks on the jeans.
“Let me finish my sandwich and I will give you something,” I replied to him. Then I asked him his name.
“Jason,” he said. I asked him how old he was and how long he had been homeless.
“I’m 32 now and I’ve been homeless since I was 12,” Jason answered.
“What’s the hardest part about being homeless, Jason?” I asked him.
“This,” he replied. “Going up to strangers and begging. I hate it, every time I do it. I wish I never had to do it.”
It seemed that my question touched a raw nerve in Jason so he then said to me,
“Listen, I don’t want to worry you with my problems as I’m sure you’ve got enough problems of your own.”
I smiled and calmly said to him, “Well, I just came home after spending 11 years in prison.”
Jason’s eyes nearly popped out of his head in astonishment.
“Wow!” he exclaimed. “And now you’re wondering what this scumbag is doing talking to me?”
I looked Jason in the eye. “Actually, I don’t think you’re a scumbag. If I thought you were a scumbag I wouldn’t be talking to you. After spending 11 years in prison I realise that everyone has a story.”
By then I had finished my sandwich so I took out my wallet and gave Jason some money, not much but enough to buy a basic meal.
“Promise me you won’t buy any drugs with it,” I told him.
Normally I never give money to a stranger who might spend it on alcohol or cigarettes or worse.
In this case, I did not smell alcohol on Jason’s breath so I thought that if I was to show him a little respect, it might restore his faith in humanity.
Jason was shocked. “God bless you,” he said as he looked at me, clearly taken aback.
“Let me tell you something, Jason,” I told him.
“Don’t ever live in self-pity. People who spend their lives in wallowing in self-pity get left behind by the world. You have chosen to live like this so only you can lift yourself out of this.”
Jason stared at me. Then he put his head down to look at the money. Then he lifted his head up again. “God bless you,” he said again.
“God bless you,” he said one last time as he walked off, still looking at me.
I spent 11 years in prison living with many different people from different countries, cultures, backgrounds and walks of life.
I listened to their stories, about their lives and their families. I listened to them telling me how they ended up in prison.
Some were career criminals. Prison was just an occupational hazard before they went on to commit their next crime.
A handful were innocent. People who were accused of a crime and then found guilty by a jury even though they were innocent.
And then there were the first-time offenders who messed up and lost hope.
These were the ones who went through a difficult event in their life but were unable to cope with it so they turned to alcohol, then crime, then violence, then ended up in prison.
I met one young Sikh man in prison for selling drugs. It turned out that he was from a wealthy and educated family. I asked him how he ended up in prison.
He told me that he was in his second year of university and his life was going well.
One day he broke up with his girlfriend and then his life went downhill after that. He turned to alcohol, then drugs, then crime. He lost hope.
Before I went to prison I would not stop to even look at a homeless person on the street. Today, even when I do not stop to talk, I definitely see homeless people and acknowledge their presence.
When I see a homeless man, I see someone who was perhaps once a stockbroker. A successful man with a family and children, living in a big house, driving a flash car. I see his marriage break up, then he turns to alcohol. Then gambling. Then debts.
First he loses his car, then his house. Then he sells off his watch and jewellery and expensive clothes to fuel his drinking habit. Before he knows it, he is homeless.
But it doesn’t change who he is inside.
We are all quick to judge people. Until we learn their stories. Or possible explanations for why they are the way they are.
That is when we realise that this person is a human being like us. Perhaps even a human with a big heart?
It is often the people who have lost everything, who have nothing, who have the biggest hearts.
This is what I learned from this 3-minute video clip that I recently came across.
Watch it. Perhaps next time you see someone homeless on the street you might see a person. Not a scumbag.
Enter your email address in the mailing list form below to receive a copy of my weekly blog posts by email.
Babar Ahmad 
May allah bless you for sharing your experiences. I cant wait untill next Monday to read another story.
last saturday I went to Sainsbury’s to pick up a few essential items with my children.
As we were leaving my 9 year old daughter noticed a beggar sitting on the pavement. After taking a few steps from the beggar, she enquired if we can give him anything from our shopping ( I dont give money to beggars).
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you for reading my posts, for your feedback and for sharing your experiences. There is a lack of empathy in the world and it is up to us to something about it.
LikeLike
Babar, I honestly appreciate your experiences you share with u. I read them with keen interest! You’ve given me reasons to go on despite the vicissitudes of life. Thank you again.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you for reading my posts and for your feedback, which is important to me. The world is a beautiful place and there are more good people in it than bad. Never forget that.
LikeLike
Please, never give up. As Muslims we are here for you and we love you my brother or sister for Allah’s sake.
Last hear I went through a bad depression but I came through and now I see why it happened and it made me much stronger. A fall at the right time can save you from so much devastation. May Allah give you ease.
LikeLiked by 1 person
“The greatest glory in living is not to never fall, but to rise every time we do.” Nelson Mandela
LikeLiked by 1 person
In South Africa , we have beggars at almost every intersection and almost every corner….most are there due to poverty, some are there on the pretence of begging….they are there to rob you. Those begging are not there by choice, its the result of apartheid. However, my fear is that most of these beggars who are in need are overlooked due to there being so many homeless people.
LikeLiked by 2 people
Thank you for sharing this. In my humble opinion, I do not blame apartheid for beggars.
Everyone has a choice whether to beg or not. The beggars have chosen to beg, whereas other people have chosen to work, sell things, provide a service, anything to earn money.
Most people who suffered under apartheid have not turned to begging.
We cannot control what other people do to us but we can always always choose how we respond to it.
Do you agree?
LikeLiked by 1 person
I can only agree to a certain point. Yes we can choose to beg or not, but with the unemployment rate being so high, not sufficient government housing, so many households left without parents, family incomes way below the bread line, many have had the choice taken away from them. Yet there are many who have chosen to beg as it easier and brings in a fairly good income in comparison to an honest yet hard days work. Which brings me to my point. Many South Africans ignore or try to ignore the person begging next to them as we aren’t sure who is in dire need or who is there for nefarious purposes, so the one who really in need of assistance is just overlooked. It’s something I battle with daily as I too have been robbed at a traffic light by a so called begger.
LikeLiked by 2 people
On the point of not blaming apartheid…… Yes I do blame apartheid. There have been many who have lifted themselves out of their poor circumstances however, apartheid is still very rife in South Africa. We still live in segregated communities especially the poor. They lack basic necessities like running water and electricity. They weren’t granted an education so we’re never equipped with skills. Don’t get me wrong . I am an optimistic person who believes in working hard but when I enter these communities it’s hard to believe that after 22years of democracy we still see impoverished townships who uses communal toilets outside their homes and uses illegal electricity connections not forgetting filling water into a bucket from a communal tap. Sadly it’s a reality and the consequences of apartheid but something we as South Africans need to address.
LikeLiked by 2 people
Awesums, thank you for sharing. I think at some point the victim needs to break free out of their victimhood if they want to get ahead. Parts of the Muslim ummah are stunted in their growth because they are still wallowing in their victimhood and blaming all their problems (unemployment, poverty, war, etc.) on other people.
The reality is that no-one can oppress you unless you allow yourself to be oppressed.
Yes, apartheid was evil but blacks in South Africa ‘allowed’ apartheid to take place by trusting the snakes who implemented it bit by bit and stole their country before they knew it.
I say this as someone who has never visited South Africa (yet!) but I have read extensively on the history of apartheid, the biographies of Nelson Mandela and spoken to South Africans who grew up under Apartheid.
Yet I still believe everything can be taken away from a man except his choice on how he responds to it.
Of course, racism still exists in South Africa. It may be under the surface but it is still there.
But at some point the ‘victim’ has to stop defining himself as a victim. Otherwise, it’s OK to think I’m a beggar, thief, car-jacker, rapist, unemployed, poor, child-abuser, wife-batterer because… of someone else, because of apartheid. In other words, there is nothing wrong with me, I just act the way I do because of someone else.
There are millions of blacks in South Africa who grew up under apartheid but do not car-jack innocent people at traffic lights. The guy who robbed you was not taking the money back to build a well for his township. He was taking it to either buy drugs, or a new phone, a new car, jewellery or clothes. I lived with criminals from all over the world for 11 years, that’s how they think!
People choose to become criminals and then they use circumstances to justify their crimes.
But I would still love to visit South Africa one day inshallah – one of the items on my bucket list was to stand in Nelson Mandela’s cell on Robben Island!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Well said and yes I agree with you. We need to shed those shackles and it may take some time but we need to do it. The beggar and the thief are most certainly two different people unfortunately with the same mask.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Oops something happened to my post while typing …..
Consider this an invitation to visit out wonderful country and our beautiful city of Cape Town. One thing I can promise you though…
Standing in the cell of Nelson Mandela aka Madiba and the entire Robbin Island tour is a wonderfully humbling experience, and there are so many unsung heroes too. We have come far in our struggle and will continue to strive for true equality for all.
LikeLiked by 2 people
Thank you so much, I will visit one day inshallah. I saw the movie Invictus when in prison in the UK. One of the best movies I have seen.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Reblogged this on Justmebreathing.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you, I hope you liked it. 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Just discovered your blog and a lot rings true with me, i wish you all the best for your honesty and openness .
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you Gary for reading my blog posts and for your feedback, which is important to me.
LikeLiked by 2 people
Amazing advice, JzkAllah
LikeLike